Our little man started Kindergarten last Wednesday. One of our friends put it so well - bittersweet. My baby is growing up. I am excited for him to make new friends and learn new things. But everyday as I take him to Kindergarten, my stomach is in knots. I miss having him at home with me. I will miss so many things as he grows.
It is also complicated by the fact that I will be having a partial hysterectomy soon which means no more babies. I started late and my body never recovered from having our little man. It has been giving me nothing but trouble since I had him five years ago. So I will have a part of myself removed and hopefully get back to feeling good. But this too is bittersweet. And all at the same time.
Which has made me cherish all the things I love that he still loves to do. I love that he still loves to hold my hand when we walk together. He still loves to cuddle in the morning when he wakes and in the evening before bed. He still gives kisses and hugs before he heads into the classroom and pretty much any time you ask for one. He laughs with abandon at breakfast.
I will continue to pray for God's perfect timing even if I do not understand. The following is from an email a good friend sent:
"Hebrews 4:9-10 says: There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his." That doesn't mean "works" as in your job and housework etc..... it's ALL "works" .... everything we do including worry that we're supposed to let God take care of! :)"
In His Grace...
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Monday, August 12, 2013
Overcome
I wrote this last year in June and it was posted on my original blog which I am no longer using. It seems to fit again in my life at this time as well.
I am not sure why but lately I just keep hearing/seeing the word overcome. In songs on the Christian radio station I listen to, in the Bible as I read through God's word. It seems to be a very important concept but one which I did not think much of previously.
I have struggled with many things since becoming a Christian - depression, fear, anxiety. And with God's help, I have overcome. I think this is why the term has come to mean something to me. Following Christ has enabled me to overcome things that for a time were disabling. I had allowed depression to overcome me, to keep me from reaching out to others, to stop me from leading a full life in Christ.
I had allowed fear to freeze me in my tracks and prevent me from fulfilling God's dream for my life.
I had allowed anxiety to prevent me from following God's leading in my life.
But I know that "God did not give us the spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline" 2 Tim 1:7. And so each time I encounter these things that threaten my relationship with Jesus, I try to remember to look to the Lord and have verses memorized that relate to each. Obviously, I look to the verse in Timothy to assist when I am fearful.
I look to a verse in Phillippians to assist when I am anxious "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" Phil 4:6-7. This has been a favorite of mine for quite a few years. I think it was the second verse I ever memorized after giving my life to the Lord.
And the Psalms that David wrote are particularly helpful whenever I feel that I am falling into the hole of depression "I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame" Psalm 34:4-5. There are numerous Psalms that encourage me and lead me toward Jesus instead of into the darkness and self-centeredness that is depression.
I pray that one of these verses might be a help to someone reading this.
In His Grace..
I am not sure why but lately I just keep hearing/seeing the word overcome. In songs on the Christian radio station I listen to, in the Bible as I read through God's word. It seems to be a very important concept but one which I did not think much of previously.
I have struggled with many things since becoming a Christian - depression, fear, anxiety. And with God's help, I have overcome. I think this is why the term has come to mean something to me. Following Christ has enabled me to overcome things that for a time were disabling. I had allowed depression to overcome me, to keep me from reaching out to others, to stop me from leading a full life in Christ.
I had allowed fear to freeze me in my tracks and prevent me from fulfilling God's dream for my life.
I had allowed anxiety to prevent me from following God's leading in my life.
But I know that "God did not give us the spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline" 2 Tim 1:7. And so each time I encounter these things that threaten my relationship with Jesus, I try to remember to look to the Lord and have verses memorized that relate to each. Obviously, I look to the verse in Timothy to assist when I am fearful.
I look to a verse in Phillippians to assist when I am anxious "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" Phil 4:6-7. This has been a favorite of mine for quite a few years. I think it was the second verse I ever memorized after giving my life to the Lord.
And the Psalms that David wrote are particularly helpful whenever I feel that I am falling into the hole of depression "I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame" Psalm 34:4-5. There are numerous Psalms that encourage me and lead me toward Jesus instead of into the darkness and self-centeredness that is depression.
I pray that one of these verses might be a help to someone reading this.
In His Grace..
Friday, August 9, 2013
In Our Own Strength
It is so easy, isn't it, to try to go through life in our own strength?
I don't know about you, but I fall into this periodically. As I do, I find that life gets more and more difficult whenever I try to go it on my own. I certainly don't plan to do it on my own. But periodically, when our family gets really busy (or I get really lazy) I find myself not reading my Bible daily, not talking to God regularly and as a result, I find myself in a downward spiral.
In my life application study Bible, I have been reading the book of Colossians. In the midst of the second chapter, there is a chart that puts it well and I have included it below:
Religion by Self-effort
Goal Please God by our own good deeds.
Means Practice, diligent service, discipline and obedience, in hope of reward.
Power Good, honest effort through self-determination.
Control Self-motivation; self-control
Results Chronic guilt, apathy, depression, failure constant desire for approval.
Salvation by Faith
Goal Trust in Christ and then live to please God.
Means Confess, submit and commit yourself to Christ's control.
Power The Holy Spirit in us helps us do good work for Christ's kingdom.
Control Christ in me; I in Christ.
Results Joy, thankfulness, love, guidance, service, forgiveness.
This sums up my findings quite well. When I try to do it in my own strength, I find myself feeling like a failure, seeking the approval of those around me and not finding it, practicing negative self-talk which leads me down the road toward depression.
But if I remember to live in God's strength, remember Philippians 4:13 "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength", I find myself with a much more positive outlook on life. I can give thanks in all things which guides me to lead a life filled with much more joy.
I don't have it all dialed in...I am a work in progress...but I pray that I can continue to seek His joy through thankfulness.
In His Grace...
I don't know about you, but I fall into this periodically. As I do, I find that life gets more and more difficult whenever I try to go it on my own. I certainly don't plan to do it on my own. But periodically, when our family gets really busy (or I get really lazy) I find myself not reading my Bible daily, not talking to God regularly and as a result, I find myself in a downward spiral.
In my life application study Bible, I have been reading the book of Colossians. In the midst of the second chapter, there is a chart that puts it well and I have included it below:
Religion by Self-effort
Goal Please God by our own good deeds.
Means Practice, diligent service, discipline and obedience, in hope of reward.
Power Good, honest effort through self-determination.
Control Self-motivation; self-control
Results Chronic guilt, apathy, depression, failure constant desire for approval.
Salvation by Faith
Goal Trust in Christ and then live to please God.
Means Confess, submit and commit yourself to Christ's control.
Power The Holy Spirit in us helps us do good work for Christ's kingdom.
Control Christ in me; I in Christ.
Results Joy, thankfulness, love, guidance, service, forgiveness.
This sums up my findings quite well. When I try to do it in my own strength, I find myself feeling like a failure, seeking the approval of those around me and not finding it, practicing negative self-talk which leads me down the road toward depression.
But if I remember to live in God's strength, remember Philippians 4:13 "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength", I find myself with a much more positive outlook on life. I can give thanks in all things which guides me to lead a life filled with much more joy.
I don't have it all dialed in...I am a work in progress...but I pray that I can continue to seek His joy through thankfulness.
In His Grace...
Friday, July 12, 2013
Tumultuous
"So do not fear, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
2013 has been a year of change for my family. It started with our move into a new home 5 days into January. We joined the masses in doing a short sale on the home we purchased in 2006 so we packed up our belongings and moved into a rental house.
The next thing that changed was our family. My husbands step-mother passed away on Memorial Day after a 3 year battle with cancer. We spent two weeks with his father in Albany, New York to help in whatever way we could.
Yesterday my husband started a new job - a great opportunity came with God's perfect timing so he moved up the ladder in the world of wineries.
I am researching surgeons to have an operation that will hopefully put an end to the chronic pain I have been experiencing for the past two and a half years.
Our little man will start Kindergarten in the fall and shortly thereafter, our family will grow as my sister-in-law will be giving birth to another son.
It will be in our minds the year of change. Some good, some hard, some overwhelming. But through it all, I know that God is with us. None of these changes have come as a surprise to Him. None of it is hard for Him to understand.
So I am grasping for His truth each morning as I read His Word and try to soak in the message He has for me each day...my daily bread. And as the tears stream at times, I will keep searching for His truth, His love and His presence.
In His Grace...
2013 has been a year of change for my family. It started with our move into a new home 5 days into January. We joined the masses in doing a short sale on the home we purchased in 2006 so we packed up our belongings and moved into a rental house.
The next thing that changed was our family. My husbands step-mother passed away on Memorial Day after a 3 year battle with cancer. We spent two weeks with his father in Albany, New York to help in whatever way we could.
Yesterday my husband started a new job - a great opportunity came with God's perfect timing so he moved up the ladder in the world of wineries.
I am researching surgeons to have an operation that will hopefully put an end to the chronic pain I have been experiencing for the past two and a half years.
Our little man will start Kindergarten in the fall and shortly thereafter, our family will grow as my sister-in-law will be giving birth to another son.
It will be in our minds the year of change. Some good, some hard, some overwhelming. But through it all, I know that God is with us. None of these changes have come as a surprise to Him. None of it is hard for Him to understand.
So I am grasping for His truth each morning as I read His Word and try to soak in the message He has for me each day...my daily bread. And as the tears stream at times, I will keep searching for His truth, His love and His presence.
In His Grace...
Monday, July 1, 2013
Love the Lord your God
"Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the Lord, the God of your fathers, promised you.
Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
When the Lord your God brings you into the land he swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you...then when you eat and are satisfied, be careful that you do not forget the Lord, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.
Fear the Lord your God, serve him only and take your oaths in his name. Do not follow other gods, the gods of the peoples around you; for the Lord your God, who is among you, is a jealous God and his anger will burn against you, and he will destroy you from the face of the land. Do not test the Lord your God as you did at Massah. Be sure to keep the commands of the Lord your God and the stipulations and decrees he has given you. Do what is right and good in the Lord's sight so that it may go well with you and you may go in and take over the good land that the Lord promised on oath to your forefathers, thrusting out all your enemies before you as the Lord said." Deuteronomy 6:3-19
What do you think? Are we still doing these things in the USA? Are we obeying the Lord's commands and not following other Gods?
Or has this great country, founded on the biblical principles and truths we find in God's word, crossed over into a period where we are testing the Lord our God?
Everything our country was founded on included God. Now through organizations like the ACLU, we are removing God from everything.
I pray that we can turn this country around.
In His Grace...
Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
When the Lord your God brings you into the land he swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you...then when you eat and are satisfied, be careful that you do not forget the Lord, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.
Fear the Lord your God, serve him only and take your oaths in his name. Do not follow other gods, the gods of the peoples around you; for the Lord your God, who is among you, is a jealous God and his anger will burn against you, and he will destroy you from the face of the land. Do not test the Lord your God as you did at Massah. Be sure to keep the commands of the Lord your God and the stipulations and decrees he has given you. Do what is right and good in the Lord's sight so that it may go well with you and you may go in and take over the good land that the Lord promised on oath to your forefathers, thrusting out all your enemies before you as the Lord said." Deuteronomy 6:3-19
What do you think? Are we still doing these things in the USA? Are we obeying the Lord's commands and not following other Gods?
Or has this great country, founded on the biblical principles and truths we find in God's word, crossed over into a period where we are testing the Lord our God?
Everything our country was founded on included God. Now through organizations like the ACLU, we are removing God from everything.
I pray that we can turn this country around.
In His Grace...
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Worrying
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? Luke 12: 22-26
I could have spent the weekend worrying about an issue at work. That is what usually happens. My mind just keeps returning to things - issues at work, with family, with friends - and without realizing it, I am worrying. The thoughts consume my mind unless I take control.
But this past weekend, I did my best to take control. I had an issue I wasn't looking forward to resolving at work and my mind returned to it over and over again. But each time, at some point I realized what I was doing. I stopped myself and prayed about it in another attempt to give it to God.
He rewarded my efforts. When I arrived at work on Tuesday, the issue had been resolved and it didn't require anything from me. God handled it when I gave the worry to Him. He is in control, not me.
I pray you can turn something over to God that has been bothering you and see what He does with it.
In His Grace...
I could have spent the weekend worrying about an issue at work. That is what usually happens. My mind just keeps returning to things - issues at work, with family, with friends - and without realizing it, I am worrying. The thoughts consume my mind unless I take control.
But this past weekend, I did my best to take control. I had an issue I wasn't looking forward to resolving at work and my mind returned to it over and over again. But each time, at some point I realized what I was doing. I stopped myself and prayed about it in another attempt to give it to God.
He rewarded my efforts. When I arrived at work on Tuesday, the issue had been resolved and it didn't require anything from me. God handled it when I gave the worry to Him. He is in control, not me.
I pray you can turn something over to God that has been bothering you and see what He does with it.
In His Grace...
Friday, June 21, 2013
Absence
I don't know if I have many readers, but I wanted to apologize for my long hiatus. It has been a trying year for our family and I had been feeling overwhelmed. Subjects to write about slowly stopped coming to me. My ability to see daily life through the lens of Scripture was fading and I didn't know how to get it back.
The two subjects I wrote on this week were slow in coming but I felt the hand of God asking me to continue to share my thoughts and so I am. It may still be a gradual process and I most likely will not write as often as I was in the past, but know I am still looking for His inspiration.
I am praying for anyone that reads and is inspired by my words.
In His Grace...
The two subjects I wrote on this week were slow in coming but I felt the hand of God asking me to continue to share my thoughts and so I am. It may still be a gradual process and I most likely will not write as often as I was in the past, but know I am still looking for His inspiration.
I am praying for anyone that reads and is inspired by my words.
In His Grace...
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